xp_logs | Nathan and Moira, Proteus aftermath (backdated to the wee hours of January 1st)

After this conversation with Alison, Nathan goes back to Moira's side and allows her to wake up. He reassures her that everyone's all right - although he has to break it to her that Rory has vanished - and they talk a little about Essex's involvement. Then Moira starts to connect the dots and realize some of the implications for what happened years ago with Kevin.

She was stirring. Finally. He hadn't been prepared to let her wake up until some of the turmoil in her thoughts calmed, but he'd been worried when he'd eased back on the telepathic suggestion and she hadn't roused immediately.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, Nathan went over and sat down on the edge of the bed next to her as her eyelids fluttered. "Hey," he murmured, his voice a bit rough as he reached out, stroking tangled hair back from her face.

Moira fought to wake up, to bring herself back from that dark pit her dreams had been. Comforting, warm but dark and she wanted to be free again. "'ey," she muttered, voice strained and tinny to her own ears. She ached. From what, she didn't know. Had she fallen down or struggled? Probably struggled. "Tell me 'twas all a bad dream."

Nathan bit his lip, hard, his eyes stinging suddenly. "I wish to hell I could," he said, his own voice breaking with weariness. All of the anger that had had him stalking around the castle while she had been sleeping was gone, at least for now.

A soft moan escaped as she closed her eyes, tightly. "Injuries?"

"Nothing serious. Bruises, mostly, a few contusions..." He had more than his share of both and his head was aching steadily, but his vision was mostly back again.

Moira thought for a second. "'ow lon' 'ave I been asleep?" she asked, feeling the aches in her muscles.

"Several hours," Nathan said very quietly. "I knocked you out, afterwards. I'm sorry."

"Probably for th' best." She frowned, bits and pieces returning to her. There was still some fuzz in her mind and she fought to clear it. "Where's Rory? I know 'e was panickin' nearly as much as poor Forge was."

As she sat up, Nathan reached out to help her, holding more tightly to her hands than he really needed to. "I don't know, Moira," he confessed unhappily. "He made it through the whole thing unhurt, I know that much, but... he's gone. Left the island, as far as I can tell."

Her glance was sharp, surprised. ""e's bloody wha'?" Groaning, she suddenly wished she could go back to sleep. "Maybe 'e jus' needed ta clear 'is 'ead. 'e's got different memories associated wit' Kevin an' 'is power, remember?" Moira realized how tired she was and leaned forward, resting against Nathan. "Essex," she whispered against his shoulder.

"I know," Nathan murmured in reply to both, his arms going around her. The conversation with Haroun came back to mind, but he stayed silent. Moira didn't need to hear about the fact that Essex was a walking dead man right now. Instead, he reached out on the link, wrapping his telepathic presence around her as securely as the physical.

"Only one who could 'ave done this. 'e 'ad access ta Kevin's files an' genetic samples when 'e was on Muir. So stupid."

She'd been all but screaming it down the link, awake and asleep, since she'd been frantically researching in the castle while he and the others tried to buy her time. But she needed to say it aloud, he recognized. "Why should you have expected someone who was a friend to do something like this to you?" Nathan murmured. "Even after you'd fallen out. It's inhuman, Moira. You don't expect something like that."

"Doesnae feel like _revenge_, like wit' Joe," she said, slowly, trying to process this. But trying to process and understand Nathanial Essex was like trying to process thermodynamics when you were three years old. Impossible to understand, harder to grasp and no way you could get to the core of it. "My God, Nathan, is this wha' would 'ave 'appened ta me boy?"

Nathan pulled back a little, gazing down at her as he felt the sudden flash of realization down the link. There was something on its heels, too, something that was almost dizzying. "Moira," he said slowly, his eyes a little wider than they really should have been. "If it was... if there was no way to save this boy..."

Tears started to gather in her eyes and Moira clutched at Nathan. "Th' DNA break down was ta fast, when Kevin's powers were brought ta fruition in this lad's DNA," she whispered. "'e would 'ave been dead in a few days. Painful, 'orrid way ta die."

"Shh..." Nathan leaned in and hugged her again tightly, stroking her hair. "Something to think about," he murmured, his voice hoarse with pain. "I know that part of you still blames yourself for not having been able to save Kevin."

She sobbed a little before drawing in a deep breath. "Aye an' even wit' this...I'll 'ave ta do more research, delve more deeply. Maybe get 'enry ta give me a 'and, aye? But maybe...I did all I could do."

"You did. You're talking to the man who's been inside your mind, remember?" Nathan pressed his lips to her temple gently. #You just have to convince yourself of that. Maybe some good can come from this in the end.#

#Maybe. Tha' poor lad. I want--need--ta find out more. Joe's bein' arrested, I 'ear...maybe 'e'll spill some information.#

Damn it, Nathan seethed privately. A Joe in police custody meant a Joe who was pretty much beyond his reach without undue risk to Moira or the school. "We'll get the information you need," he said aloud, as soothingly as he could.

"Need ta sleep," she murmured, not letting go of him.

"Do you want me to send you back to sleep? I can do that. And try and make sure you don't dream." He sighed raggedly, shifting his hold on her as she nestled against him.

"Natural sleep, this time. Yer more exhausted than I am. Dinnae go, though?"

"Shift over a little, then," he murmured. She did, and he stretched out beside her, managing to do it without letting go of her as she settled down against him, still clinging. "You're all right," he said after a moment. "You, and the baby..." Something he needed to say aloud, he supposed.

Moira's hand fluttered down to her stomach and she smiled, tears falling over. "We're bot' jus' fine," she whispered, feeling Nathan's hand cover hers. "Been through th' wringer, we bot' 'ave but we'll be fine."

"Oh, good. Still, can I kill the next person that looks at you sideways?" It was supposed to be a joke, but his voice broke, his eyes blurring with tears. He shifted, pulling her in closer. She was alive, she was fine. So was the baby. Bullet dodged.

Without saying anything, she turned on her side and wrapped her arms around his neck, holding on tight. They would speak later of how the boy had recognized her. For now, it was time for relief and love and, most of all, sleep.