xp_logs | Amanda, Hank - Saturday afternoon

After sleeping the bulk of the morning, Amanda wakes to see this announcement by Hank. To say she's not happy is an understatement. During the course of the 'discussion', a few things come out that Amanda's obviously been brooding on lately.

"What the bloody hell do you think you're playin' at?" Amanda demanded, storming into Hank's office. Well, it was more of a stumble than a storm, since she was still a tad wobbly on her feet after the spirit summoning, but the intention was there.

Hank looked up, blinking, and then frowned. Oh. Right. He probably should have expected this. He was having trouble anticipating, right now. "I take it you mean the general announcement I made about not asking you for magic?" he asked, just to be sure.

"Of course that fuckin' announcement! What else?" Leaning slightly against the doorframe so she could glare without falling over, Amanda crossed her arms over her chest and, well, glared. "What gives you the bloody right t' decide whether or not I do magic, huh? You're not me bleedin' magic tutor, so why don't you butt the hell out?!"

Hank blinked. "I never said you couldn't do magic," he said, a little puzzled. He was sure he hadn't said that.. because she was right, that wasn't something he had the authority to do. Her health and her safety, on the other hand, were his responsibility. "Did I?"

"You said no-one was t' ask me for any kind of magic. An' since I'm not supposed t' be doin' it for meself, you've pretty much stopped me from doin' anythin' at all!" she pointed out. "An' not all the stuff I do is that hard on me - I've been doin' it a long time, an' there's any
amount of stuff I can do without windin' up in medlab, only no-one's gunna bloody well ask me now since you've decided you're gunna lay down the law without even fuckin' well askin' me what I wanted."

"I'm sorry," Hank said, wincing. He'd misjudged. Again. Damnit. That was happening a lot, lately. "Amanda, you can still do magic for others. But if the other students cannot be trusted not to pressure you to do things that you shouldn't, then the use of your magic is clearly something they don't deserve." He paused. He was usually more articulate than that, wasn't he? "I don't mean that you can't do magic for them, within your limits. Just that they'll have to wait until you're ready to offer."

"How'm I s'posed t' know if they need it if they don't ask?" Amanda demanded. "'S not like I'm gunna go 'round everyone every day an' ask 'em, is it?" Her accent was getting thicker the angrier she got, which probably wasn't helping matters. "Fuck it, McCoy, you should've come an' talked t' me before makin' this big bloody announcement - it's bad enough I can't use the healin', but you're makin' it sound like I'm bloody useless!"

"I was concerned for your wellbeing!" Hank snapped. "Which is more than I can say for Jay. You are my responsibility, Amanda, and if your classmates won't consider your safety..." He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," he said more quietly. "I shouldn't have shouted at you. I was worried about you, and perhaps I overreacted."

"Too bleedin' right you did," Amanda told him coldly. The raised voice only served to make her more antagonistic. "I did it 'cause I thought Jay was gunna hurt himself - poor bastard was that desperate t' settle things. An' maybe it was the wrong thing t' do, but at least I tried. Which is more than any of you bloody teachers've done for him, lettin' him sit up there in that room of his an' brood himself int' that sort of desperation."

"It may have been the right thing for you to do, once asked, but it was *not* something he ever should have asked you for," Hank said grimly. "We've all lost people we love, Amanda. Most of us, however, do not risk a second death to set our minds at rest." He sighed. "I've been... on edge, the last few days," he admitted. "I'm sorry if I overreacted, but it was out of genuine concern, I promise you."

"Sure you were concerned." Amanda sounded unconvinced. "An' the damage is done, now. So I hope yer happy - I'll just go be one of yer nice normal little students an' stop fuckin' with yer view of the world now, shall I?"

"Amanda..." Hank took a deep breath, trying to gather his vexingly scattered thoughts. "I am sorry that I acted so hastily. And I am very sorry that I snapped at you. But I am responsible for you, because I agreed to take responsibility for the limits we placed on your use of magic, and I wanted to make it clear that anyone who tried to take advantage of you would answer to me. I did promise, I recall, that I would do so." There. That was better. More coherent, anyway.

"That was just healin' magic. If I'd known you were gunna stick yer nose into all me affairs, I wouldn't have agreed to the whole thing!" Amanda shot back. "What is it with you bloody people? You, Strange, Tante... I've got this power an' no-one will fuckin' well let me use it!"

"You may use it as much as you like." Hank growled softly under his breath, rubbing his eyes. His head hurt, damnit. "Amanda, should any of your friends or classmates need magical assistance - healing still excepted, of course - you may offer it to your heart's content. And if you wish to assure those whom you trust not to take advantage of you that requests are permissible, then that is fine. I simply wanted to be sure that you would not be... made use of... again by those who might not consider the consequences to you."

"This is gettin' us bloody nowhere... Once people read that post of yers, they're not even gunna speak t' me 'bout problems they might be havin', let alone let me know if there's somethin' I can offer t' help with. An' I didn't let meself be used - I did what I thought I ought." Amanda ran her hand through her hair, clearly frustrated. "Look, just ask me before you do anythin' else for me own good, right?"

"I will. And I am sorry." He took a deep breath, trying to stay calm and think clearly. "I will not interfere again. I just..." He smiled sadly. "I was concerned about you. I promised to help you say no to people, if you had to, and I hadn't been much help."

Perhaps a little mollified by the repeated apologies, Amanda relaxed a smidge. Just a smidge, 'though. "You promised t' help me say no t' people wantin' healin', or at least that's how I understood it, an' that's worked. The rest... that's my lookout." She'd made a mistake with Jay, but she'd rather cuther tongue out than admit it to Hank, especially now she'd gained the upper hand in the arguement. A new thing for her, given how often the doctor was able to run verbal rings around her and point out logical inconsistencies. She squared her shoulders. "Magic's always gunna have a price, that's part of the deal. I knew that goin' in with this spell for Jay - I just hope it was worth the effort."

Hank nodded. "It was for the healing, at the time... since it didn't occur to me that someone would ask you to do a big spell of a different kind." He reached out to pat her shoulder gently. "You are a student, Amanda, and it's my job to look after you, and keep you from being hurt on the rare occasions when that's possible. It's why I became a doctor, and it's very important to me. When you got hurt, and for such a reason, I got angry and overreacted."

"T' be fair on everyone else, hardly anyone asks me for magic help," Amanda admitted. "Big or small." She didn't add that it would probably be no-one now. "You don't understand what it's like, havin' a power like this, doc. When I got here, there were people who thought I was bloody balmy for sayin' I could do magic. Even now, there's a few who don't really accept it. An' I was able t' come out as a mutant durin' that speech, but I had t' pretend I was telekinetic, so's not t' complicate things. It's what I do, an' I can't even tell most people, even those that can accept people shootin' force beams out of their eyes or havin' wings or bein' able t' read someone's mind. I can't do the same trainin' as everyone else, I have t' go off-campus for me lessons with Strange, an' that means I miss out on a lot of stuff that goes on." A hint of wistfulness had entered her voice. "An' then it feels like I've got the same people who don't really believe in me power tellin' me what t' do with it - you can see where I'm comin' from, yeah?"

"I can." He smiled ruefully. "And then I jump in and make things even more complicated for you... I am sorry." He thought about it for a moment. "Are you doing any physical training?" he asked, frowning a little. "I don't recall... I'm sorry, I'm a little overtired, I think."

"Some. 'M doin' Pete's self defence class, well... yeah." She didn't have to mention Pete's lack of commitment to teaching lately. "An' Nate was teachin' me for a while. Otherwise... not really." She frowned herself - McCoy had been off for a while now. "An' you should be the one makin' sure you're looked after - want me t' make you up one of Homily's general conditionin' potions?"

"You should talk to Scott or someone about it," he said seriously. "Some hand-to-hand training and so on is bound to come in handy." He rubbed his temple and smiled ruefully. "And yes, the potion would probably be a good idea. I'm all right, just... overtired. I've been trying to make up for my previous absence a little too hard, I think."

"I will." Amanda didn't mention the lessons she had with Domino whenever they were in the same space - somehow she doubted those would be approved of on the curriculum. "I'll just go make you up some - no magic involved, witches' honour." Her tone brooked no argument - Hank would be drinking the potion, no matter how bad it was. And it was one of Homily's worse ones. "You doctors are bloody hypocrites, y'know? Always goin' on 'bout us not lookin' after ourselves an' then you go an' do the same thing," she almost lectured, preparing to go and make up said potion.

"I will drink it happily. And yes, we are... those who can't tell others to do it, you know." He smiled at her. "Take care of yourself, Amanda. I'm sorry I was so high handed, but my intentions were good."

"Humph," was her only reply. "Stay put, I'll be right back," she instructed, before heading off to brew that potion.