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Monday afternoon, Alison's office. Amanda drops by to have that talk with Alison. The discussion covers many things, from Meggan's legal identity to things Amanda should consider seriously in regards to taking care of her – though are none are imposed, leaving the choice up to Amanda herself.

And there, there's another topic to discuss.

Sorting through the files on her desk, Alison took a slow and deep breath, and let it out slowly. The papers, one after the other covered in notations and signatures were bringing back old and not so old memories. So much had changed since she's signed some of those, and it was a bit dizzying to think back on how things had been before. And how they were now. Settling them down neatly she closed the file and set it aside, returning to the notes she'd taken on the pad before her and the ones still on her computer screen.

Outside Alison's office, Amanda took a deep breath and knocked on the door. She'd taken care to dress neatly, in one of the outfits Manuel had selected for her at one stage - white cotton shirt and black pants, black leather vest over the top. Grown-up, but not completely unlike her. In her hand she clutched the notes she and Nate and Moira had drawn up, with additions from Samson. The whole plan. Alison was the last step before she went back to the Professor. Steeling herself, she knocked on the door.

Looking up, Alison stared at the door for a moment, before calling out calmly. "Come in." When Amanda entered Alison was leaning back in her chair, hands resting on the arm rests. "Have a seat. Though there's stuff to drink in the mini-fridge if you want anything," she added. Not entirely formal, but clearly not casual either.

Amanda grabbed a bottle of water, not because she was thirsty now but because she knew her throat would be like sandpaper later. She'd had more long talks with various authority figures since she'd brought back Meggan than she had in her life, and she had the feeling this one wasn't going to be any easier. Taking a seat in the chair opposite Alison's desk, she nervously spun the cap off and took a sip, trying to think how to start. "Um, thanks for seein' me," she said at last. "I figured, since you've done this before, you'd be able t' help me with, y'know, everything."

"Well." Alison tilted her head to the side a bit at that, considering the notes she'd gathered. "Actually - I haven't exactly done this before." Seeing Amanda's expression, she continued. "The variables are very different. Drastically so on some levels." Pausing once more, she collected her thoughts. "I'll help in whatever way I can. But this is, in a lot of ways, far more complicated. It could be made simple though. If done right." Shaking her head, she leaned back again, realized she'd been tensing up. "What did you have in mind already? We can talk about that first."

Amanda took another sip of water, then recapped it and put the bottle on the desk. "I know I can't be Meggan's legal guardian," she said. "'M too young, an' me papers wouldn't stand up t' the sort of checkin' involved. I've asked Nate an' Moira 'bout it, but I wanted t' talk t' you too. Figured the Devil Woman'd see a problem we haven't."

"Papers could be settled," Alison replied dismissively, not reacting to the nickname. "There would be a waiting period probably needed but that's not the hugest issue, at least in my opinion." Looking at Amanda squarely, she continued. "Your youth for one would stop things dead on, yes. You're absolutely right. But that wouldn't even be the biggest issue of all for Social Services. Your lifestyle previous to now would be and your psychological profile upon evaluation for fitness, as well."

Amanda resisted squirming in her seat uncomfortably. She had been wondering when someone would bring up the addiction, plus the rest of it. "'S why I didn't even think 'bout adoptin' her legal-like," she admitted. "Any way you look at me history, I'm not fit. I'm not like that any more, but still, the police record an' everythin' Social Services have on me ... no-one'd give me a chance t' even try an' convince them I'm different." Then a thought occurred to her. "Unless you're bringin' this up 'cause you don't think I'm fit t' look after her anyway, without bein' her legal guardian?" There was a certain amount of trepidation in her tone, but stubbornness too. She'd fight to keep Meggan, if it did turn out to be the case.

Alison had already guessed what Amanda might have also talked to Nathan and Moira about - it was an obvious thing, there. "I think you want what is best for Meggan, no matter what else is in the balance. And I think that if what is best proves not to be you, that you will do what needs to be done. Seek out what is best for Meggan. Not what you want or what you need to do, but what she ultimately requires to have a good life once all is said and done." She waited a bit, to let the words sink in. "You haven't had the chance to prove your fitness yet. That's not something done overnight. But your first step when you found her - to bring her here, where you would have support in take care of her and she would have a chance to live as normally as possible considering her obvious mutation? In my opinion, it was a step in the right direction. Smuggling her over international borders without dealing with the situation in her country of origin even nominally so? Not so good."

Amanda opened her mouth to reply, then shut it and thought through her answer again. She had to be careful about this. "I do want what's best for her," she began. "An' if that ain't me, then all right, I'll step aside an' let someone who is take over, even if Meggan herself won't like that at all." It had to be said - the little girl was undoubtedly attached to her, and anyone wanting to care for her in Amanda's stead was going to have to deal with it. Not a threat but a statement of fact. "As for smugglin' her in... There's no record of when or where she was born, no papers that we could get hold of, tho' t' be honest, we didn't try too hard. The Szardos family an' the government... there's no love lost there, 'specially with what they thought happened t' me. I asked Kurt t' sort things out for her t' come back here, since I don't speak much German or really understand that stuff - I figured he'd spoken t' the X gee, t' the Professor an' sorted all that out."

Shaking her head a touch, Alison sighed, though there was no condemnation to her following words. "No, he didn't. Not that I blame him, the urgency of bringing her back drove things along, but Ororo was all shades of surprised to find out the girl she'd ferried back was an illegal. I don't think it occurred to Kurt back then that it might be problematic, since the circus used to smuggle him across because of his mutation from what I heard." Glancing at her notepad again, Alison went silent, even though she knew the notes she'd taken down by heart. "Charles has looked into a way to make Meggan's identity legal since though. He has contacts in Social Services and we've been through that previously with Miles, and since with a few of the Mistra kids that we couldn't find any back trail on. Those contacts are what helped smooth things for me when I became Miles' guardian, and then his adoptive parent." It was scary how much it had helped, all things considered, and Alison still remembered the hoops she' d had to jump through then, and every time since for the evaluations, too. "You were thinking of asking Nathan and Moira, weren't you?"

Amanda nodded, remembering Nathan's words about putting a positive spin on things, not the negative. "I figured they'd be able t' take care of her, if anythin' happened t' me since they're so good with kids an' all," she began. "But Nate pointed out he's not exactly legal here either. But Moira is, an' she's all respectable with the science research an' the Lady Kinross part of it, an' she can support Meg if that's what the government wanted proof of. Good guardian material, I thought." She resisted the urge to bite her nails, since the shirt was tucked in and the usual twisting of the hem was out as well. Tucking her hands under her legs, she continued. "I haven't had a chance t' speak t' her yet 'bout it, but I think she'd be willin'."

A long, considering look greeted that. "I understand your reflex to do so. But I'd like for you to consider a few things. First of all, Social Services usually prefer to re-integrate a child within their own cultural background as much as possible. Second of all - she is here illegally. Manufacturing an identity for her would be one way of fixing that, but these things usually have a way of coming out as the worst possible time. I worked with Social Services here, to make Miles' own papers as rock solid and legal as possible, when we got back from Mexico, for one. And skipping a whole batch of points, by not establishing her legal identity as a German citizen, in her area of origin and then establishing her with a guardian who can claim to be able to raise her within her Romani origins... you leave the door open," for the Grgic to run a scam to extort money from Moira by showing up with Meggan's real mother or a close relative, "for a lot of trouble in the mid to long term." And with Moira as her guardian as opposed to Margali, they would have a shot at that sort of tactic. If only by threatening to expose Amanda and her history, at that. "But with Margali as guardian... you know, no one could complain about you legally being her sister."

See, this was why she'd wanted to speak to Alison. She saw all this, with that devious mind of hers. Definitely more to the woman than the rock star label. Amanda considered Margali as the option. Hmm. Not one she was 100 per cent happy with, but it did make sense for all the reasons Alison had given. And if they were here at the school, and not there with the clan, there were limits to how bossy she could get. "That could work, providin' she's willin' t' let Meggan come back t' the school," she said at last. "But I think Kurt an' I can convince her it's for the best, given the trouble she had with Kurt when he was little." And Margali would understand the bond, too, being a witch herself. It was why she hadn't insisted they stay the last time.

Raising an eyebrow slightly, Alison leaned forward on her desk, resting her chin on her hands. "You're forgetting something, I think. Margali already let Meggan come down here with you once. Why would she raise a fuss about it again, when you're obviously doing you best to make this as safe for Meggan as possible, while providing both her and yourself with a fair number of safety nets in the process?"

Amanda looked a little abashed. "Just... bein' me usual paranoid self, I s'pose. You're right, she's done it once already - havin' her down on paper as legal guardian shouldn't make a difference." She hoped. Alison bringing up her history had made Amanda not a little worried that others would be considering that too, and making decisions as to her fitness. "'Sides, Kurt'll be here too, so it's not like she's bein' left just t' me." The internal pressure was getting to her, and she absent-mindedly began chewing on her thumbnail. "Like you said, me history ain't the best. I don't know how much Margali knows 'bout all that, an' I'm guessin' I probably should tell her, before we do this. I don't know how she'll take it." The woman might be her mother, but she had no clue as to her reactions, couldn't anticipate them the way she could say, Nate or Moira.

"Well then. You want to take steps so that when you tell her, you can also point to everything you're doing to set those aspects of your life where they should be now that you're responsible for helping Meggan integrate a new life, don't you think? Come prepared and with a plan already in hand to make sure there isn't any objections possible from her regarding your past actions and choices." From underneath her notepad, Alison withdrew a folder and pushed it across her desk. "Look through these. Any decisions made in regards to any of the programs are up to you. If Samson already hasn't recommended it, I suggest you speak to him every week, as a way of making sure your mental balance is steady since that will be a requirement for being a resource person for Meggan. He can probably help you select what you need the most from these, too," she added, nodding at the folder. The AA information had been dead easy to find, as had many others things. "You'll want to not smoke around her. Might want to consider stopping it entirely but that's up to you." And everyone at the mansion knew Alison had a thorough dislike for cigarettes, at that, so it was clear it was entirely up to Amanda. "You'll want to remove any alcohol which by all rights should not be on the school premises anyway from your room - if there is any. You'll want to make sure there's no way for Meggan to get to your magic paraphernalia too. Keeping it under lock, both mundane and magical might be best."

Where to start? Don't get defensive, Amanda reminded herself, taking the folder and flipping through the contents briefly. The AA leaflet stung - she only drank when she went out now, given Pete wasn't around to take her to the pub - but she reminded herself that while she was legal back home now, she still had another three years to go here. And it wasn't like she'd spoken to Alison about any of her addiction issues since... well, since ever. "I've been seein' Samson every couple of weeks, with the addiction stuff," she said evenly, keeping her tone matter-of-fact. "I can bring that back up t' once a week again, if he thinks it's a good idea. Probably is, what with the not copin' recently." She left Alison to interpret that how she would. "The magic addiction's under control - didn't slip once durin' all that time I knew 'bout Pete an' couldn't tell any one, or when Nate got so hurt." There was a small note of pride in her voice - it had been hard, but she hadn't resorted to any kind of drug, be it illegal, alcohol or the magic. "An' I don't smoke around her - she doesn't like it, for one, an' I know it's not good for her. Dunno if I can stop altogether, but I've cut right back - don't have the time, really. No booze in me room - got rid of the last bottle the night I heard 'bout Pete's dad. An' the magic stuff can go in me study down in the library, if people don't mind me keepin' that room - no-one was usin' it, an' I needed a quiet place t' be able t' concentrate an' not be interrupted." There, all laid out, nice and plain and without raising her voice or getting whiny.

Alcohol in her room, which was hardly a surprise all things considered - Alison wondered if Amanda realized this and the extent how it would have affected things if her past behavior had come under official scrutiny. Not only for Meggan, but for Amanda herself. And the school. Lovely how the basic school rules were considered as toilet paper at times - it wasn't so much about guessing if any other students did the same as just laying odds on who they might be. Alison made a note to email Charles about this, mentally deleting the words 'stupid' and 'asinine' from the first draft.

"You know, this reminds me. The concept 'cannot tell anyone' is going to have to disappear from your vocabulary and your general way of thinking." The flatness of her voice hinted as to what she thought of the fact that someone had decided to tell Amanda that without so much as clearing it with anyone, never mind the person actually in charge of the school and the students there. Heaven forbid it be assumed Charles might actually tell Amanda himself. Heaven forbid, she thought a bit distantly this time, a chill settling in the back of her mind, anyone tell Amanda anything now. She could never know, until it was all said and done. It was as simple as that. "If you're going to establish that the school and the people here are there to help Meggan, they will need to know what is going on with you."

Oh, she wasn't letting anything slip past her, was she? Amanda caught the slightest tightening of Alison's expression before it smoothed out again, and assumed it was about the booze. Restraining a sigh - since she had been in the wrong to keep booze in her room, but she hadn't had to admit that - Amanda nodded. "I'll try," she said. "I know you want more 'n that, but this is askin' a hell of a lot. The way I was brought up, the magic, the time on the streets... I'm not makin' excuses, just pointin' out I've been doin' it one way all me life, an' I know it's not the good way t' do things, but it is a bloody hard habit t' break. I do talk t' Moira an' Nate an' Remy, if that helps." She wouldn't bring up the fact she'd told Pete pretty much everything, after a while.

"Helping Meggan to get used to life here and now? Will ask everything of you, Amanda. Everything. And it won't compromise about it and it won't be ready to soften the blows for you at any time. Ever." Alison was absolutely calm as she went on, laying the facts down as she's learned them. Sometimes the hard way, which she had no doubt Amanda would be doing too no matter what was said. After all, anything said in this discussion would happen only be Amanda's own choice, really. "And what I'm asking of you now isn't excessive in light of that. You are going to have to break habits and defense mechanisms left, right and center for Meggan's sake. While not erasing yourself into being only about taking care of her. It's not an easy balance to find," she murmured. She shook her head a bit, and for the first time the ghost of a smile showed. "If it helps any, I think you did the right thing from the start. You brought her to a place where you could make sure you could ask for help. Keep I mind the reason why you did that later on when things get seem to get too hard, mm?"

Well, nice to know she'd done something right. Amanda couldn't help the slightly bitter thought, and then shoved the feeling aside, back into those over-used boxes in the back of her mind. She was having to push aside a lot of things these days, between the empathic foundling with the horrendous background, and the empathic possibly-ex boyfriend foundering so badly on the seas of identity. Nodding, she said, "Fair enough. I understand this is gunna take a hell of a lot of sacrifice on my part, but if it means Meggan's happy an' healthy an' havin' a good shot at life, then I'll do me best. An' more than, if that's what's asked. Includin' askin' people for help an' lettin' 'em know when I can't cope."

"That'd be part of the not losing yourself in the helping her, yeah. I was seeing Charles fairly often at the start, myself." And she still wasn't taking anything for granted at all in everything she did where Miles was concerned, though she'd learned to not discount the positive comments from others either. "I have a few other stacks of paperwork for you to go through. The stuff for Germany, if you decide to go with Margali as guardian." She paused, then rolled back her chair, reaching out for two inch thick binder, and weighed it in her hand pensively. It was still growing, every now and then. "If you want we can go over some of the stuff I had to go through for Miles at the beginning, in the following days. This file stays here though, so we'll have to work out when is best with both our schedules. It's not the same, but it will give you some insight into things." Many of which Amanda would be skipping entirely, including the grueling psychological profiling of the adopting parent.

"Yeah, well, tried the losin' meself in someone else last year. Didn't turn out that well for either of us." Manuel was definitely another factor she was going to have to address, she knew that. She was keeping Meggan away from him for now, for both their sakes - the girl was quite fixed in her dislike of him, and Amanda was still trying to figure out why. But if there was any chance of reconciliation with him, and she hadn't given up that hope yet, it was something that would need to be addressed. No training from him, though - on that she agreed with Nathan. She took another deep breath, steeling herself for the mountain of paperwork ahead of her. "That'd be good, goin' over stuff with you. I'll talk t' Kurt, an' Nate an' Moira, 'bout the Margali thing, but I think you're right, it does seem the best way t' sort all the legal stuff. I'll arrange someone t' watch Meg when you're free an' we can go through all that? Even if I'm not adoptin' her meself, I should know what's involved."

Alison shook her head. "Why don't you just bring her along? Even with the lack of English she can still just putter about the office and explore. It was Miles' proofed ages ago and short of her trying to stick her finger in an outlet I think we'd be okay." She tilted her head towards one of the filing cabinets. "There's a few of Miles' toys there too, it should give you a fair lead into what kind of toys she might like for you to pick up for her later on." She decided to broach the matter of money and wills and setting up trust funds later.

Amanda blinked, and then gave her a grateful smile. "That'd be good. 'S hard, leavin' her - neither of us likes it that much, even tho' I know I need the break sometimes, an' she needs t' get used t' people who aren't me more. People keep tellin' me she needs t' meet Miles too, but I figured I'd run that past you first, after you'd met her."

"You'll both have to get used to not always being together. She'll have to start classes, probably remedial soon at that." And if she kept going, she'd be repeating herself. A lot. Alison grinned a bit ruefully, then moved on. "Might want to talk to Charles about the possibility of giving her an telepathic info dump on the language? He did it for Piotr when he arrived here, I think. As for Miles - well, he knows. I told him about it and he'd heard about it too. I think it may happen in its own time, that particular meeting." The smile faded though, and Alison leaned back in her chair slowly, studying the far wall above Amanda's head. She'd have to be told the official story, at least. It was only... fair that it come from her. Steeling herself, she focused on Amanda once more. "There's something else we need to talk about, Amanda."

As much as she didn't want to owe the Professor anything, it was looking like she was going to have to. Another sigh stifled, Amanda nodded. "I'll talk to the Prof 'bout all that - it needs doin', I can't be there t' translate for her all the time. An' there's words she don't know, things she can't explain, an' it's important that she can." The sudden change in Alison's demeanor caught her notice, and she gave Alison a slightly-wary look. Another part of her behaviour that needed changing? "Fire away - 's what I'm here for, the talkin'."

"This..." There was no bowing out of this, nothing but walking into it, head held straight. "This isn't about Meggan, actually. It's something else." She took a slow breath, settling her hands flat on the table, knowing the news would soon be made general in a sense, though perhaps not the entirety of it just yet. Amanda, however, would be told.

Now.